Misery in a Bottle

I learned about the effects of alcohol at a very early age. My very first “best friend� and I were inseparable. Ask our moms. We were always together, at my house playing dolls in my room, drinking milkshakes at the drugstore, playing dress up in my grandparent’s attic, on the swing set in our backyard. But I don’t remember her room. I never played there. Her father was an alcoholic and the family suffered many of the consequences you can imagine. It wasn’t until we were older that her mother, a very brave, dear woman managed to make a way of escape for them, that I was able to spend the night with her in her new home.

This week, the effects of alcohol have come back very clearly to all of us. My children are seeing now what I saw as a five year old, the consequences of alcohol. Walk back through our past week with me.

• Bernie and I were on our way home from school. As we rounded the corner by dumpster on the way to our apartment, one of the two men who “live� there was asleep on the curb, totally inebriated. As we got near, he rolled into the street just as an SUV was backing up. We both started yelling (I don’t remember what, but it was probably in English). Bernie ran and banged on the back window just as his torso was mashed between the road and the bumper. The vehicle stopped just before the wheels crushed him completely. He never felt a thing. His friend was in no condition to help him, so some passersby rolled him back off the road into the dirt. He probably doesn’t even know where the bruises he inevitably has came from.

• As we were walking back from the market, two other men, again intoxicated, were fighting in the street, with bloody hands and faces. They were too drunk to care how it looked to those walking by.

• While walking to church, Bernie and Cori saw another man fall into a hole. It was a struggle, for him just to get up. He wet himself in the process.

• Three nights ago, one of the leaders in the Student Church (the one who was supposed to preach this Sunday as a matter of fact), got drunk, broke into the building and took money. He is now awaiting church discipline and will have to find some way to repay the money.

These men all had one thing in common. They all exercised their freedom to drink alcohol. In the end, they pay a high price. It may have cost them their family, their friends, their jobs, their health, their dignity. For one, hopefully not eventually his ministry. I am not going to use this space to debate whether or not Christians should drink. Most people reading it know how we both feel about that and it is not my intent or desire to offend anyone.

I’m not really sure what my intent or desire is for this. Maybe I should ask friends who have been there what they would like to see me do with it. I could ask our former neighbor, David, or our dear friends, Bryan and Chris. These men have all looked this addiction in the face and are daily making the choice to live in freedom from alcohol. By their own testimony, it is the grace of God that has and continues to enable them to make this choice.

I could ask our house helper, Narah, who has won our hearts and is becoming part of the family. She lives every day without her father, who chose alcohol over his family when she was three years old. She has had to learn that God desires to be the Father she never had, and that He will not reject her.

I suppose, I will just use this to beg you to pray. Pray for those you know who have been affected by this and that somehow God would redeem their pain. Pray for the Christians here who have come to Christ from a past of alcohol abuse and that they would be delivered from its power. Pray for healing for their families. Pray for the church that it would know how to extend love and grace and mercy and help in light of this need. Pray for us, that our hearts would not grow dull as we see this every day. Pray that we would be available at any time in any way if God would see fit to use us in the lives of those we walk by. Pray “even so, Lord Jesus, come� because only then will all addictions and all strongholds be abolished. Until then…may we all be found faithful.

My First Open House

For those of you who were part of our lives in Franklin, you know that one of my favorite things to do was have an Open House. This is something I did every year at Christmas time, and if I could find an occasion, at other times as well. I loved to prepare a smorgasbord of different appetizers, desserts and beverages. I would work for weeks on a menu, shopping list and other phases of planning. Then I would cook for days before while Bernie and the kids would clean up and run various other errands.

Last week I had the opportunity to do that here in Mongolia. God has provided our little church with a new facility. We are renting a theatre for worship services and have four rooms in the basement for various ministry purposes. After a weekend of ministry training by a visiting Korean short-term team, the students went out into the streets to invite passers-by to our new worship place and then to a fellowship celebration afterwards.

So about two weeks ago I started putting together the menu and making my lists. I knew it had to be quite different from those I would do in the States because of limited access to ingredients and the Mongolians’ simple food tastes (i.e., meat and potatoes). The completed list looked like this:

Luncheon Meats (salami, bologna and various other fatty meats)
Fresh Bread
Veggie Tray with Ranch dip and Spicy Salsa dip
Fruit Bowl
Crackers and Cheese (Cheddar and Mozzarella – NOT Mongolian)
Peanuts
Sugar Cookies (decorated by Cori)
Banana Bread and Strawberry Bread
Chinese Donuts
Chocolate Oatmeal Cookies

Overall, I was pleased with the list. The ladies on our Mongolian team have a secondary agenda to introduce vegetables into the student’s diet. I knew they would love the sandwiches (which they coat with mayonnaise) and fruit. I hoped they would try the veggies, and who doesn’t like cookies?

Junhy Kim suggested we explain to them about the food before starting, but her husband Jacob was eager to get started, so he prayed to bless the food and turned them loose. Here is what happened:

• We had three tables in a corner of one room. The drinks and plates were on the first table, the meat, cheese, crackers, etc. on the second table and the sweets on the third table. They have no concept of forming a line here, so they all grabbed plates from the first table, skipped the second table and went to the other end of the dessert table. They filled their plates and then moved en masse to the second table.

• They were very intrigued by the cauliflower. They thought it was a type of mushroom. Juhny had to show them to dip it in the Ranch dressing and assure them it was good. Some were convinced to try it, some weren’t.
• Some of them put two or three things on their plate. Some of them piled their plate with huge mounds of food – three plates full!

• I had purchased the mayonnaise in a squeeze bottle to make it simpler. They had never done this before, so Junhy had to put the mayonnaise on their bread.

• Many of them didn’t try the European cheese. Narah had six slices – on her banana bread.

• They were confused by the dip. Some of them put it on their sandwiches, some on their banana bread and some of them put it on their sugar cookies (with icing and blue sprinkles).

Overall, it was successful. They ate all the meat, bread, fruit and cookies and about half of the vegetables. They didn’t eat very much crackers and cheese. Most of them cleaned their plates. We threw away very little food, except for one plate of someone’s uneaten cookies. I think I saw a tear in Dennis’ eye when he had to throw that away. Our field director loves his cookies.

The food was not the only interesting dynamic. Bernie and I had invited one of our language teachers and she came with two Korean friends. That was exciting for us. There was also a good response to the invitations given out by the students just before the service. There was a little street boy who came to the service and took the opportunity to ask all the foreigners for money. There was the older gentleman in traditional Mongolian clothing who went outside to smoke a joint between the service and the meal. They all had one thing in common – they realize their hunger for food. They need to know that the hunger in their heart can only be filled by God.

The students themselves were very encouraged and seemed to have a good time. Dennis asked us what we learned. As an afterthought, I know what I learned. Every one of the guys came up to me with a big smile on their face, shook my hand and thanked me. None of the girls did this. Moral of the story – regardless of what culture you are in - the way to men’s heart is still through their stomach.

A Tribute to My GrandfatherIsaac (Jack) Loving

The morning I called to check on my Grandfather and learned that he was no longer with us, I had already done my Bible reading for the day. I am glad of that, because the verse I read that day has made me think of him often.

It has nothing to do with comfort or peace. It is not a psalm. It was an odd verse for a devotional book.

I Chronicles 27:30 - Over the camels also was Obil the Ishmaelite.

What a strange verse to find comfort in. What does that have to do with anything? Amy Carmichael, who wrote the devotion I read said this…

“God knows all about you and your difficulties, and your name is not forgotten by Him. He thought the name of a camel driver who lived three thousand years ago worth writing in His book. The names of thousands of great kings are buried and forgotten, but the name of (King) David’s camel driver is remembered to this day.�

I believe Obil was faithful. My grandfather didn’t drive camels. He drove a bulldozer. He drove it faithfully for many years. He did it because he loved his wife and daughter and grandchildren and wanted to provide for them. I never heard him complain about the long days or the heat or the cold. No matter how tired he was he was never too tired to spend time with me when he got home. He was never too tired to sit with me on the front porch swing and read to me or sing to me or to tell me stories.

I have learned so much from him and some of it, I am still learning even as I am 14 hours away right now when I want to be home. I learned to be faithful with the life God gives you. I learned the value of family. I learned that people are more important than things. Granddad was always ready to give even if it required sacrifice.

At Christmas, he was more interested in what he gave us than what he received. I know this, because most of the gifts we gave him, Mom and I had to clean out of the wardrobe when we went through some of their things a couple of years ago. They were still in the box.

But back to what I learned… Granddad was faithful, generous and loved sacrificially. He was a man of integrity. Bernie and I have said often that we hope we have half as much character as he does. I know my brother and sister-in-law felt the same way, because both of us named our sons after him, Jonathan Isaac and Jack.

The last gift Granddad gave me was once again his support. When I broke the news to him that Bernie and I were moving to a country he had never heard of to teach, he was so very happy for us. We were able to talk about what we would be doing in our new jobs. I know that he understood that would mean we would not be there with him when the end came. But as he has always done, his love for us sacrificially let us go without complaint, but with understanding and putting our needs before his own.

I don’t feel like my words have been adequate to describe my Granddad’s character, but Bernie said I would need to write a book to do that. So, I’ll just say I hope we can follow his example.

I think if King David had needed a dozer driver instead of a camel driver, his name would have been Jack.

The Rest of the Story

Disclaimer: this is a long blog. If you haven’t read my previous blog, you should read it first.

I shared in my previous blog the verse the Lord put before me on the morning of August 25th. Now, let me share with you the devotional readings from the previous two days. These readings are from “Whispers of His Power� by Amy Carmichael.

August 23

Luke 14:26: If anyone comes to me and does not hate his own father and mother and wife and children and brothers and sisters, yes, and even his own life, he cannot be my disciple.

If any man come to Me, and hate not…That is the point that halts us. We must remember that here we have the Oriental idiom of sharp contrasts, and the word hate is used as the opposite of love. Our Lord was not claiming that we should have a malicious attitude of heart towards our loved ones, in order to be His disciples. He was facing the possibility of competition in loyalty with the things that He names.

He did not name a low thing, an ignoble thing. He was facing the possibility, which often occurs, of a conflict between that which is beautiful in itself and loyalty to Him. Nothing is fairer, finer, more beautiful in human life than love of father, and mother, and wife, and children, and brothers and sisters. Yet these fair things may, and often do, challenge our loyalty to our Lord.

Thus He was declaring that, if ever an hour strikes when there is a conflict between the call of the highest earthly love and the call of Christ, then there is only one thing to be done. We must trample across our own hearts and go after Him, without any compromise and any questionings.

August 24

Luke 14:27: And whosoever doth not bear his cross and come after Me, cannot be My disciple.

The taking up of the cross always means the emptying of the life of everything that is merely selfish in motive, and high things may become that. If there shall come a moment when a man has to choose between the call of Christ to sacrificial life and service, and the appeal of high and beautiful earthly affection, there is only one thing to be done according to the terms of Jesus. That is to follow Him.

He calls for much; He calls for everything. He calls for the march that may have no return and can have no compromise. He demands this loyalty because His enterprise is a crusade. Its method is that of the cross, and there is no other way. Because He goes that way, His disciple also must go that way.

So, for three days, the Lord is speaking to me of competing affections, of taking up a cross, of certain affliction. I had to trample across my own heart to leave friends and family behind in the US. Actually, it seemed more like a stampede.

On the evening of August 25th, after writing my previous blog, I received an email from my father telling me that they had taken my grandfather to the hospital. Tests revealed that he had a heart attack. He lingered for almost a week, with my parents, my brother’s family and many friends at his side. They were able to hold his hand and tell him they loved him. I knew when I told him goodbye when leaving for Mongolia in July that this time was coming and I would not be there. My secret hopes to be able to attend his funeral were not realized.

The beautiful love between a grandfather and granddaughter was not sacrificed. But the physical expression of it was not realized in this hour because Christ’s crusade for us at this time is in Mongolia. Every day in Mongolia a grandfather dies without ever having heard of the love of God.

Yes, I realize I have written another Kleenex blog – I have my own box at hand. Indulge me another moment, because there is a little more to this story. As I write this blog, there is a beautiful 17 year old Mongolian girl named Narah cleaning my home. While she cleans, she is singing along with Chris Tomlin, “Holy is the Lord, God Almighty� even though she doesn’t speak English. This is the song the Lord gave Bernie and I for Mongolia when we were here in 2003. I wish you could see her face when she sings with the praise team on Sundays. It is for Narah, it is for her grandfather, her family that we are here.

When I think of missing my grandfather’s funeral, it is still incredibly painful. In addition to that, we have received more painful news that our beloved dog, Chipper has cancer and is going to die soon (editor's note: Chipper died this week. We are greiving with our friends, the Parnell's - two families that Chipper had become such a part of) . But our God prepared my heart, has kept me and comforted me, and I know that this pain doesn’t begin to compare with the glory that will be revealed to us, to you, to Narah, to the Mongolians.

And now you know the rest of the story… at least what we know for now….

Affliction, Deliverance and the Promises of God

For those reading this in the U.S., I doubt that you think very often about the fact that you are in North America. I know I didn’t. Here, we are constantly reminded of the fact that not only do we live in Mongolia, but that we live in Asia.

I would also guess that most of you, when you pick up your Bible, pick it up expecting to be encouraged or blessed or perhaps challenged. I know I do.

So, the other day when I picked up my Bible and read the following verse, I confess that I really just wanted to go back to bed:

For we do not want you to be ignorant, brothers, of the affliction we experienced in Asia. For we were so utterly burdened beyond our strength that we despaired of life itself (2 Corinthians 1:8).

Bernie was quick to remind me that if you go on to read the rest of the passage, God delivers. Another confession here – I don’t really like having to be delivered. You don’t get delivered from pleasant or easy. You need to be delivered from painful or difficult.

Let me clarify that so far the affliction we have experienced since our arrival in UB has been minimal, practically non-existent. We have it remarkably easy here so far. I’m very grateful for the cushion God has given us. I know there will be hard times ahead. But I know that when they come, there is a God who will deliver us in His time.

After I regrouped and began to read again, I finished my reading with this:

You also must help us by prayer, so that many will give thanks on our behalf for
the blessing granted us through the prayers of many (v. 9).

There are so many of you praying – holding the ropes for us. I am humbled; I am grateful; I am blessed. Thank you. Some day we will all give thanks together for God’s blessing upon this land because God has answered our prayers.

On a lighter note, here are some things I miss that I took for granted:
1. Safety seals on food products.
2. Non-smoking sections in restaurants.
3. Grass
4. EPA pollution controls.
5. Ease of communication.
6. Friends